And I work for a defense contractor. Damn! You work for a defense contractor? Wow, that is not who I thought you were gonna be. Can I get some pronouns going? Uhh she/her. Okay, got it. Are you a trans woman? I absolutely am. You're a trans woman. Now, are you the only trans woman working at the defense contractor? No?! There's just a defense contr
or use Face ID? Hold on. RANDOM MATT RIFE MEMORABLE MOMENTS. *SOMEONE IS GETTING A PHYSICAL*. You all right? I'm sick, sorry. You're sick? Go home. I paid to see you, I've come to see you. You paid to see me. I'll FaceTime you. You're very sweet. Thank you. Is your cough getting better? I'm sorry. No, you don't have to apologize. It's okay. You wan
Classic John Pinette on why everyone should have a buffet.. Get this. I'm at home last week. Guy knocks on my door. He says to me, 'They're starving in Kosovo.' And I said, 'I've been here all day, pal.' I didn't eat nothing of their stuff, honest. I thought he was blaming me. Come to find out, he just wanted money to feed people. Now, I was happy
I love America. You don't like America? You don't like America? F*ck no! Why not? They're f*ckin doucheb@gs. Alright, well... Look at your hat. You literally have the douchebag hat on. But you legitimately don't like America because what? They're dumb. They're stupid? And what do you do for a living? What do you do? It doesn't matter! Yeah, it does
In general, who do you think's more homophobic? Men or women? Men. Are there any straight single guys here? Yeah? Can I ask you a hypothetical question? Yeah. Say you're on a date with a woman. Things are going really well. You're into her. She's showing you photos on her phone and then accidentally shows you a photo of her making out with another
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