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avatar John Paul
i said offhandedly to a man in work that i had a girlfriend and he paused and said

i said offhandedly to a man in work that i had a girlfriend and he paused and said "my sister is also of... your persuasion" and now i'm convinced he's a vampire

avatar Olivia Veqqie
Dear person reading this, I could be naked right now and you would never know.

Dear person reading this, I could be naked right now and you would never know.

avatar Olivia Veqqie
Just got done driving this girl to Ikea, and she left a rock in my car. What does this mean? Session ID: 1019676.

Just got done driving this girl to Ikea, and she left a rock in my car. What does this mean? Session ID: 1019676.

avatar Olivia Veqqie
IF YOU THINK YOUR JOB SUCKS, JUST REMEMBER THIS, THERE ARE PEOPLE OUT THERE WHO HAVE TO MAKE DILDOS WHILE FIGHTING THE URGE NOT TO START A

IF YOU THINK YOUR JOB SUCKS, JUST REMEMBER THIS, THERE ARE PEOPLE OUT THERE WHO HAVE TO MAKE DILDOS WHILE FIGHTING THE URGE NOT TO START A "COCK" FIGHT WITH THEIR COLLEAGUES

avatar Anthony Miller
Being a dude really sucks cause wym go see what that noise was

Being a dude really sucks cause wym go see what that noise was

avatar Charlie Chocolate
When your shower is too hot and it hits your back

When your shower is too hot and it hits your back

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