Sorry ladies, I'm married to a freakin' awesome wife. She's a bit crazy and scares me sometimes, but she is a perfect mixture of sunshine and hurricane. She loves me unconditionally and if you mess with me, the beast in her will awake & they'll never find your body. (Yes, she bought me this shirt)
@theortegaspartyof6
I know my wife is a strong independent woman, but I know that doesn't apply to filling up the gas tank, house repairs, emptying the trash, driving us everywhere, lifting heavy objects, bug squishing, mowing the lawn, or filling her water bottle.
My wife woke me up this morning and asked me if I wanted a Blow Job. I said, "Really!" She said, "No... April Fooaarrrrglegargle" That'll teach her to be funny!
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