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avatar jojo9

Do you realize if you sit on the toilet at 11:59 PM and the clock strikes midnight, it's the same shit, different day? Funny! Follow!

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avatar Jeremy Jordan

I asked Alexa what do women want? The thing hasn't shut up for seven days. Follow me already.

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avatar Gaie Houston

They're now taking little Western European kids to the mosque to go on their knees and worship Allah. The schools that used to teach the Bible, the schools that used to teach the Ten Commandments to little kids, they're now teaching them the Quran. Instead of praying the Lord's Prayer, "Our Father in Heaven, Holy is your name," they're praying "All

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avatar Anthony Miller

Mr. Smith, you might want to think real hard before you answer this, but anything you say can and will be held against you. Boobs. Roses Department Store. Buzzard Butt County Sheriff. Buzzard Butt Coffee Shop. Let's Be Ridiculous.

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avatar Gaie Houston

Not too bright. Now, I was at the restaurant the other night. I tell you, my waitress wasn't a bright bulb. I said to her, 'I've got a question about the menu, please.' She looks at me and she says, 'It's none of your business about the men I please.' @Garycraigactor

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avatar Patricia Lee

Wife's hands. Honey, what's wrong with your hands? I got blisters from using the broom today. Well, hell, next time drive the car.

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